=(

I wish time could just stand still. Days pass by like crazy and I am so afraid that I won't have enough time with him. There are so many things I have yet to do with him, so many things that we can discover together but I I know time is of the essence. You have no I idea how afraid I am. I really wish he could stay, wish so much he could have made the decision to stay. I love him so much it hurts. It hurts to love him. It hurts more to know that he is leaving me for good. It sucks to be in this situation. I seriously do not know what or how he feels. I know it excites him. To be exploring new things. I hope he will remember us here, everyone of us. I am gonna miss him, we are gonna miss him.

I hope I will be ok one day and stop crying at night, when I think of all the happy memories and what could have beens.
Had a great day today, spending time with him and loving the shoes he got for me. I am really gonna miss him. I really am. I am gonna miss him a lot. But he will be going to a better place. I wish I could fit into all that.

I am gonna miss him. =(